The “Bong” Squad

Suck it in, don’t blow it up! (courtesy of Capital Concepts)

A couple of years ago, and not long after the attacks of September 11th, I was visiting family in Washington, D.C. and had my first and only experience with terrorism.

Actually, it wasn’t so much a terrorist act as it was a misunderstanding, but you can never be too careful.

I was walking through the Holocaust Museum when suddenly, security officers locked us in and told us to stay put. Apparently, someone carrying a briefcase entered the lobby and left it sitting beside one of the benches. And from what I gathered, that person was long gone and the fear was that the briefcase may contain a bomb.

The good news is that everything worked out and nothing bad happened, unless you count the 45 minutes everyone spent looking at the same display over and over again. As I said before, though, you can never be too careful. And I’ll take caution over complacency any day.

Something similar happened in Spokane, Washington recently.

Police were called when a pedestrian noticed something strange leaning against the wall of a local business. To him, it looked like some kind of pipe bomb, so he immediately contacted the authorities.

A short time later, the Spokane Police Bomb Squad arrived on the scene to examine the crude PVC pipe device and to detonate it safely, which they did. Only later did they discover that it wasn’t a bomb at all.

It was a bong.

This means that somewhere in Spokane, there’s a stoner either wondering what he did with his bong—we all know how weed can affect memory, especially when someone is baked—or angered at the images of his bong exploding all over the local newscasts.

It’s time to find some new paraphernalia, my friend. Might I suggest something less conspicuous, like maybe rolling papers?

No one ever called the bomb squad about them!

Posted on March 6, 2013, in Perspectives and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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