Greatest Hits: The Dark Humor of Death
Originally published on December 4, 2012. It’s a little morbid, but that’s kind of hard to prevent when your subject is death!
When you think of death, and trust me when I say this is something I try to avoid in most cases, it is often difficult to equate it with anything but morbidity and depression. However, the Grim Reaper obviously has a sense of humor and I personally feel it’s healthy to explore the lighter, more hilarious side of our ultimate demise. I am obviously not alone as people all over the internet have explored the lighter side of death in endless forums. Nevertheless, I would like to throw my hat into the ring and remind everyone that even in the most grim circumstances, there is some “funny” to be found.
Let’s start with that final announcement that comes when you push up daisies: the obituary. Here are some of my favorites from around the web:
“Dolores had no hobbies, made no contribution to society and rarely shared a kind word or deed in her life. I speak for the majority of her family when I say her presence will not be missed by many, very few tears will be shed and there will be no lamenting over her passing.”
“He was born in a log cabin… and was circumcised with his dad’s pocketknife.”
“Mike wanted it known that he died as a result of being stubborn, refusing to follow doctors’ orders and raising hell for more than six decades. He enjoyed booze, guns, cars and younger women until the day he died.”
“Loren… passed away of complications from MS and heartbreaking disappointment caused by the Kansas City Chiefs football team.”
“He was a connoisseur of root beer and bacon, searching far and wide for varieties he had yet to try.”
“When his family was asked what they remembered about Fred, they fondly recalled how Fred never peed in the shower—on purpose. [He] sadly was deprived of his final wish, which was to be run over by a beer truck on the way to the liquor store to buy booze for a double date to include his wife, Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter to crash an ACLU cocktail party.”
“Louis bought the farm, having lived more than twice as long as he had expected and probably three or four times as long as he deserved. Lou was a daredevil: his last words were ‘Watch this!’”
“Her regular emails to family were often unintentionally hilarious as her typing was spotty and her typos were legendary. She was a difficult mother and a horrendous mother-in-law. She will STILL be missed.”
“In lieu of flowers, the family respectfully asked that donations be sent to the American Cancer Society or to the campaign of whoever is running against President Barack Obama in 2012.”
Even more entertaining are some of the gravestones people select to adorn their final resting places. Check out this gallery of some of the more strange, funny and bizarre ones to be found: