A Baaa-d Habit
As final exam time approaches on most college campuses, students search for ways to alleviate the increasing amounts of stress they experience. Some turn to constructive methods of stress relief, like meditation and exercise, while others choose a darker, more disturbing path.
This is about a student in the last group—a college student from California’s Fresno State University.
Early this morning—around 3:30 a.m.—police were called to FSU’s agricultural barn to investigate some strange noises… noises coming from the school’s Sheep Unit (hint hint).
When the cops arrived, they caught a fifth-year computer engineering student with his pants down… literally. The young man was on top of a ewe and initially claimed to be “wrestling cattle,” despite there being no cattle to speak of in the area. When officers pointed this out to him, he then claimed to be beating and punching the sheep to release stress.
That wasn’t the truth either, I’m afraid.
After questioning the student further, he finally admitted to his real crime: having sex with the sheep, an act he claimed was the result of too much drinking.
“Am I going to be expelled for this?” he asked. The cops couldn’t provide him with an answer, of course—due process being what it is—but he was charged with sexual assault of an animal. Fortunately, the ewe is being treated by a local veterinarian and should be fine.
I’m sorry, but wasn’t the drinking supposed to provide this guy’s stress relief?
Better yet, will security be posted outside the Sheep Unit so another student’s unit doesn’t end up in a sheep?
Posted on November 18, 2014, in Perspectives and tagged animal cruelty, bestiality, college student, commentary, Crime and Justice, current-events, entertainment, funny, humor, news, perspectives, sex, sick, Stress Relief. Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.